5 Reasons Why Functional Alcoholism is the Worst Kind

5 reasons functional alcoholism is the worst kind

Functional alcoholism is an oxymoron. And here are five reasons why functional alcoholism is the worst kind…

1) You Have a Confidence Deficit

Always on the cusp of greatness. You know you have potential, but for some reason, you don’t have the confidence to execute.

Confidence comes from believing in yourself, not from others believing in you.

You have no confidence because you tell yourself you will quit… That you will get better… That you will reach your potential.

But you never do.

And because you lie to yourself… And pretend to believe it…

Why should you ever trust yourself to do what needs to be done?

You’re the biggest risk there is.

2) It’s Groundhog Day

A functioning alcoholic is like Sysiphus of Greek mythology…

Sysiphus was punished for his self-aggrandizing craftiness and deceitfulness by being forced to roll an immense boulder up a hill only for it to roll down the other side…

He was forced to repeat this action for eternity.

The same is true for the functioning alcoholic.

Day after day you screw yourself over.

You know the possible outcomes. But you’re repeatedly flipping a coin, and hoping for a third possible result.

It can go on forever because, unlike some off the rails alcoholic, you will have…

3) No “Moment of Clarity”


You’ll just ride a slow death spiral for years.

You’ll be miserable and will make others around you miserable too.

Your “moment of clarity” may never come because you need to hit rock bottom for that.

And rock bottom is for the lucky ones.

At least they found a stopping point.

But hey, at least you won’t die…

No, you’ll live a long, long time and…

4) You’ll Let Your Friends and Family Down

You could have done better.

You could have been more responsible.

Your startup had a chance.

You could have been more disciplined.

You could have been a better role model.

But you’ll never know because you’ll continue with your…

5) Quiet Suffering

You’ve heard the call to start the “Hero’s Journey“… A message that can change your life forever, but you ignore it.

Always tomorrow.

Instead, you read a lot of self-improvement books… And call it progress.

You say to yourself, and maybe those around you…

No one can pull me out of this but me.

And you say it over and over again because you’re “honest”.

More like hypocritical. And the quiet suffering expands…

Yup. Your husband or wife should probably leave you.

But they won’t. Which sucks for them. They’re just miserable enough to want to leave, but not in enough pain to actually do it.

If they left you it might be enough to cause a wake up call…

Enough to grow a pair.

And finally get off the sauce.

Bonus 6th Reason: The Wrong Kind of Ordeal

A sixth reason why “functional alcoholism” is the worst kind ever is that you’re subjecting yourself to the wrong kind of suffering.

Yes, you need to suffer. But you need to suffer from the pain of quitting drinking, finding the cause that has been inside you all along and becoming the person you know you are meant, but are currently too afraid, to become.

Wishing you luck.

And here are some good podcasts to listen to if you’re trying to quit or cut back.